Still Can't See Nothin' Comin' Pages 262-326

Summary:
In her diary it stated that the night before she died her father has raped her once again. He raped her almost everyday for 3 years. At that time his father, mother and brother had returned home. Enraged with what he had discovered Jim confronted his father about it. His mother got upset and smacks him so he punched her in her face. His father than ran towards him but Jim checked into a violent rage and began beating his father for all the times he had beaten him in the past, and all the time he had hit his sister, and all the time he has raped his sister. The mother than called the cops and Jim left, the first place he headed was to Leslie’s house until morning. When he arrived at Leslie’s house they had relations but Jim was going threw withdrawals and ended up drinking a brand new bottle of cough medicine. Realizing that he would hurt Leslie he left and returned to Philly’s house.

When Jim arrived to the house Jeremy said that they should rob Sunshine’s. Of course Philly and Jim was against the idea but at the end they decided to rob it only if Charlie wasn’t there. March 12, 1992 they walked to Sunshines and seen a guy packing cans of soup and no one else. Jeremy was the first to pull out his gun and he placed it at the man who turned out to be Charlie. Stunned Charlie did not move a mussel and Jeremy was threatening to shot him. Afraid that Jeremy would shoot Charlie, Jim pulled out his gun and aimed it at Jeremy. The two of the began to argue back and forth when Philly entered the store. He meant to hit the roof but something happened and the bullet hit Charlie. Jeremy immediately left with the guns while Philly and Jim stayed back and tried to help Charlie. The thought that kept running threw Jeremy head was that the little boy who loved them and admired them would die because of them and it killed him inside.

Jim left shortly after that unaware that they cops were called and were arriving when he was leaving. They told him to freeze but he immediately began running with the gun still in his hand. The cops had given up chasing him on foot and he began running towards the bridge where his sister had died. He was running by the bridge and twisted his ankle in a ditch. He feels and laid there for he was too tired to get up. The cops finally caught up with him and the ambulance was called placing Jim upon a stretcher. In the hospital Sarah (the nice cop from before) was waiting to have a word with him. She apologized for what happened and knew she could have prevented it. They were going to lock him up before but she wouldn’t let them. She said he wasn’t capable of committing a crime.

The story then flashed forward to August 1992. Before Jim would leave for court he and Leslie had relations for the last time. They knew it would be a long time before they could hug or even kiss so they took advantage. In the morning Jim hugged Billy and he told him how much he loved him and how terrific of a kid he was. As the cops pulled him away no one was crying. At this point in his life Jim had realized why his sister died, and he had realized that he still couldn’t see nothin’ comin’ and he had to forgive himself for the wrong he had done and forgive all the wrong that was done towards him so he can be a man. He finally took responsibility for the life that was giving to him and he left with the cops as gentlemen would with the utmost respect. He had finally become a man.

Quotation:
" Leslie and I weren't crying, though. We were remembering, and hoping ( Marshall 322).

Reflection:

In this quote you can see that Jim grew up. He understood what was going on and accepted it. He was only remembering the good and bad times that had occurred in his live and he was hoping that he may began a new life where he was in control of everything. He was a man now and was determined to make the best out of any situation that was handed to him.

Jim lived a very difficult life and unfortunately there are many storied in the world like his. The only difference is that Jim realized what he was doing with his life was wrong and he decided to change it. He realized that he was lost and he found himself the day he turned himself in. You can relate Jim situation to the situation of Drew Barrymore but she was not physically abused like Jim was. Although Jim made some terrible decisions he can still be looked upon as a role model because he was able to overcome the obstacles in his life and he became a man. When all hope was gone and all determination was relinquished he still realized that he could become something not only for him but for his siblings. I am very proud of Jim!

Still Can't See Nothin' Comin' Pages 196-261

Summary:
Wanting to get high and have relations with girls Jim, Philly and Jeremy came up with the idea to invite three girls over for alcohol and drugs. The girls were already chosen and the liquor was already brought, the only thing that was needed was the drugs. Jim was asking everyone for drugs and the only person on campus who had any was a black drug dealer named Tony. The rumor was that Tony broke kid’s ribs because he was late on the drug payments. Knowing that he didn’t have the money, Jim asked Jeremy if he could negotiate with Tony so that the money could be paid tomorrow. Philly and Jeremy was waiting at Sunshine (Charlie’s store) when Tony arrived, Philly was no where in site. Upset that they didn’t have the money; Tony began to beat up Philly and Jim. Philly then rose and called Tony a Niger which made Tony upset and he placed a gun to Philly’s head. Before he could pull the trigger Jeremy showed up with his gun. Afraid that Jeremy would shoot, Tony dropped his gun and Philly robbed him for all he had. The drugs, money, guns and sneakers he had on. Philly, Jeremy and Jim proceeded to go back to Philly’s house with the guns still in their hands when Charlie walked to the door and seen them. This changed the relationship between Charlie and Philly.

Once the boys arrived at Philly’s house they immediately started drinking and experimenting with the drugs they had stolen. Philly had taken to many drugs at once and was too high to even stand. The girls rung the doorbell and Jim answered. It did not take long before all of them were high. The boys and the girls began having relations at this time. Jim said he felt ashamed that he lost his virginity to a total stranger rather than the love of his life Leslie. In the morning when the girl left, Jim and Jeremy began talking about taking a trip to the ocean. The only problem was that they were broke. Then the idea of robbing someplace popped into their head. Before Jim would rob any bank or convince store he decided to visits his brother. That after noon he broke into his house and immediately went for the bar. Jim does not know why he went into his sister’s room but he did and the first thing that caught his eye was her diary.

Quotation:

" I still can't see nothin' comin "( Marshall 236)

Reflection:

Jeremy was the one who spoke this line after he and Jim had the discussion about going to the ocean. Jeremy had loved Mandy tremendously and when she died he explained that a little bit of him died with her. He said that no matter how much he tried he just ran into bad things and it was because he did not care.

I think that Marshall put this quote as the title because it causes you to think. No matter how much you may try and plan out your life anything can happen in a blink of an eye. Life was going great for Mandy until she had began to be sexually harassed. The love shared between Mandy, Jim, and Billy was unbreakable until Jim began to become and alcoholic. With this quote Marshall is basically saying to live your life to its potential because you never know what crazy thing might happened next. That you can not control what’s going to happen in the future but you can control what is happening in the present.

Still Can't See Nothin' Comin' Pages 131-195

Summary:
Six weeks after the death of his sister, Daniel went into a dolorous stage in which he only left his bed to take a shower, use the restroom and sometimes to eat. His mother allowed him to stay home instead of going to school because she knew that he had a close relationship with his sister and he was truly hurting. Daniel was also getting beat every night by his drunken father. After Mandy’s death he began to drink even more and blamed Daniel for her death. He would walk into his room at anytime of the night and yell at him saying things like “why didn’t you save her?” He also said things like “if you guys were so close, why would you let her die?” Not being able to deal with the abuse, Daniel began to spend the night with Philly and Jeremy. They spent every night getting drunk or high. What Daniel failed to realize was that his little brother Billy was being forced to stay home because of the fear his parents had of losing the only child that is left. Billy was not only mourning about the death of his sister but he was also dealing with feelings of loneliness and abandonment because Daniel had left him.

Leslie and Daniel also broke up. While Daniel was going through his bacchanalian stage, Leslie was going through a rehabilitation stage. She seen how alcohol had affected Mandy so she decided to change and when Daniel told her he was not changing she decided to leave. She told them they could get back together when he changes his way. That situation basically allowed Daniel to run wild. On the day of Billy’s birthday, Daniel attempted to steal a video game from a mall store to give Billy as a gift. He was caught by security and was arrested by a nice cop. He was then realized shortly after and was driven home by this nice cop. By the time he got home it was midnight and Billy was crying his eyes out. Daniel had messed his birthday and Billy realized that he was alone in this world. Daniel reassured Billy that he would never be alone in the world and reassured Billy that he loved him. At that time they realized that they would forever be brothers and they would always be together. Daniel slept in Billy’s room that night.

Daniel and Philly decided to go to school on the days when they felt comfortable enough to go. Philly was a straight A student and Daniel was barely passing but he was in advanced classes. Daniel was really smart and could get straight A’s as well but he did not want to put forth any effort. During school, Philly and Daniel was having a conversation which led them planning to get high later and find girls who would have sex with them. Philly would get the girls and Daniel had to get the drugs. The chapter left off with Daniel asking a kid name Tony for drugs. Tony was a 17 year old sophomore.

Quotation:

"Why didn't you save her, Jimbo? Huh? Didn't you care ( marshall 134)?

Reflection:

Daniel’s father had said this to him one day when he was drunk. I do not understand why the father treats Daniel in this negative manner but has a lot of love for Billy. I do not understand how he can say such hurtful things towards Daniel, knowing the relationship that he had with his sister. I do not understand why the mother allows this type of behavior in her house. I am only a sister but I can not imagine myself saying something so hurtful towards someone that I love. I do not believe that Daniel is a bad kid at all. I think that Daniel is lost and needs someone who can have a good influence on him to come into his life and he would change. I think the reason why Mandy killed herself was because she was lost and felt as if her life would never change. Her depression became too much for her to deal with and unfortunately she gave up. Due to the father’s abusive ways and all the invectives he told his children they will always be traumatized. I do not understand how he cannot be penitent every time he put a hand on his children. My heart also goes out to Billy because he had had to expierence all of this uncanny behavior at the age of 11. There is no way he could have been able to comprehend all of this craziness and still be able to have a childhood and be happy. What his parents did not realize was that their actions not only affected them but it also affected their kids.